There are times when as a mother I feel… satisfied. I wish I could say that this feeling is all the time, or even a feeling that is more normal than not. However, I would say that it is fleeting and somewhat elusive. More often I feel overwhelmed, insane, tired, frustrated and useless.
Good thing motherhood isn’t about feelings.
I’m not saying that feelings aren’t valid, or even useful. But they aren’t what defines a mother. They aren’t even helpful. They are just feelings. I’ve heard women talk about raising their kids and they use the same words I just used and feel so defeated and upset over the use of those words. Like somehow each mother believes that if they use these words to describe motherhood then that equates failure.
On the contrary… it makes us normal.
I’d like to just take a minute to remind (as if you didn’t already know) us of what a mother is resposible for, and what is expected from us. (These aren’t just mom’s jobs- dad’s play a part too… but today I’m speaking to the mom’s heart)
1. Full time care giver. Not full time as in 40 hours or so, but full time as in 24/7 non-stop, always on duty, care giver.
2. Cook. Now whether you can cook or not, it is expected that as a mother you provide food for the child. 3 meals a day, 7 days a week. Menu planning, grocery shopping, prep and clean up. Full time cook.
3. Transportation. If your child is involved in anything- guess who’s expected to make sure they get there? Yep, Mom. Oh, and not all schools provide transportation… so that, during the school year, pick up and drop off, every day- Monday through Friday.
4. Maid. I thought about using a different word… but really maid is the best fit. Cleaning the details, laundry for every body, general maintenance around the house… yep- mom’s job.
5. Task Master. There comes a time when as a mom you need to teach the young ones to take responsibility. But in order to teach and get it to habit… task master becomes another title. This isn’t to be confused with slave driver… this is just making sure that each takes up and does what is expected. Not making them work themselves to death 😛
6. Cuddler. Now I admit that this is my favorite “chore” of motherhood… but each child needs to have at least a moment or three of cuddles per day.
7. Teacher. All lessons learned every day. How does mom deal with ___________? Does she sing while working? Does she love Jesus? Does she love me? How do I do ____________? Craft time, play time, bed time, cleaning time all of these provide daily and important lessons.
This is just a small list of things moms need to do. And admittedly, I am not the best at all of them. Somedays, I’m not any good at any of them. But this isn’t a job for the faint of heart. It isn’t easy. It isn’t loaded with high pay, great benefits (other than some fantastic love and more cuddles from your children) And it isn’t one for us to take lightly.
Yes some days I am overwhelmed by the massiveness of it all. But other days I find myself sitting and enjoying every minute. Just like everything in life- there are cycles. But remember to push through and keep moving forward and hopefully allow the kiddos to see Jesus in all of it. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The smiles and the tears.
Feelings pass, Truth remains. Truth is this- being a mom is the best and worst job on the planet. Truth is- I wouldn’t ever go back. Truth is- I love my kids and I pray for the lessons of Jesus’ love make it to their hearts and that they see the truth lived in me.