Over Spring break AJ, Cam and I went to Michigan to visit family and friends. I was excited to see everyone.
I had plans with so many people and knew it was going to be crazy, but at the same time very much needed. I needed to see my crew… ya know?
So Saturday afternoon we piled us and all our crud into the car and headed up north. We stopped off in Northern Indiana to visit long time family friends (30 years plus) – The Kortokrax’s for “Uncle Bill’s” 60th birthday party. I got to meet several of my “nieces and nephews” (the Bills boys were considered our brothers when we were kids) that I hadn’t met before and watched as Cam and AJ got tangled up in the crew’s shenanigans. Bon fire, games in the dark and lots of kids- reminded me of when we were all kids. It was a pile of fun and the kids had a blast.
Marissa and Mom were there too, so they got to witness one of the funniest events of the night… AJ is getting squished in a giant hug by one of the little girls there. I teased him and said “Aw look, AJ has a girlfriend!” he looks at me with complete exasperation on his face and replies “MOM! She can’t be my girlfriend, she’s my cousin!” Well… not quite, but I found it hilarious that he accepted that as fact without a moments hesitation.. at least when it was convenient.
Needless to say we didn’t get to Michigan until very late/ early morning of Sunday.
We had a scheduled lunch with Anders and his new forever mom and dad. And the kids were looking forward to it… so was I, but it’s still painful to see him and hug him and know that he’s not ours anymore. But the visit went well… and the kids had a nice rowdy visit. 🙂
After we got back to moms I FINALLY got to meet the cutest, most sweetest, big smoochy cheek nephew. That little boy is more precious than any photo could show. And as AJ put it: “His smile is so beautiful, it just lights up his whole face!”
There was a lot of emotion that went along with me on this trip. Fear, anxiety and complete anticipation of loss. The father of lies had me convinced that the things of this last year were going to cost me my support crew of friends and family. I was totally ready to say good-bye to people. So even though I was very excited to see everyone, I still was worried that they wouldn’t want to be part of my life anymore.
So, as I got ready to go out for ladies night, those were the emotions going through my head and heart. I knew there were a pile of girls coming and that made me happy, but I just wondered what was going to happen. And how many of them were going to withdraw from my life.
How amazing it was for me to understand that these ladies not only came for the fun, but are there for me… like in the “no matter what” kinda way. The father of lies, is just that… full of lies. I came away from that night filled up. Full of hope, joy and smiles. And blessed.
Monday was time with dad… lots of time. And although I still think he’s given up on life, he at least had a real conversation with me. Which he hasn’t done in well over 3 years.
Tuesday was filled with one thing after the other. But it started with an awesome hair appointment, some amazing coffee and friendship, and finished with more destruction of lies.
Needless to say, it was an amazing trip and one that brought me peace… and as we experienced Easter yesterday, that peace was expanded and emphasized in all of our hearts.